All in USA

Alexandre Family Farm Organic Chocolate Milk

Powerful flavor comes at the expense of a heavy dose of chalk. Such strong cocoa presence, that it feels like the individual grains of powdered cacao are besieging your tongue with ‘total annihilation’ as their collective charter. Despite vigorous shaking, I couldn’t get all the cream to mix in (which would have mitigated some of the grainy coarseness). All things considered, it's a memorably potent and flavorful chocolate milk that has a place in this world as well as my refrigerator shelf.

Broguiere's Chocolate Milk

Thick and ‘hearty’ (I hate that word), with a lingering sweetness and prominent vanilla flavor. I'm guessing that the thickness is its most beloved feature by the Broguiere’s faithful, but it feels a bit overplayed and not reinforced with enough chocolate or accessible creaminess (it goes down in gulps rather than a seamless dispersion from mouth to throat) to compete with the elite.

Straus Family Creamery Organic Chocolate Milk

Wow— super strong cocoa flavor, paired with a mature, undersweet sourness that delivers a haymaker of deliciousness! It offers what I desire most in chocolate milk exceedingly well— creaminess unencumbered by viscosity, brilliantly indulgent and punchy mature cocoa flavor, and a unique had-nearly-one-thousand-chocolate-milks-but-nothing-quite-like-this factor that puts this into rarefied orbit for me.

Morning Fresh Premium Chocolate Milk

Warmly creamy and a pleasant maltier cocoa quality that stands apart from many over-sweetened, candified chocolate flavors. It has a bit of fine grain to the texture, but the cream disperses extraordinarily well, causing you to bask in the afterglow of each sip.

Plains Dairy Premium Chocolate Milk

Excellent all-around flavor and texture, shading a bit to the sweet end of things, but it still feels responsible and focused on tasting how chocolate milk should. A salty snap puts a welcome finish on each sip— it’s a cheap date, but one you’ll look forward to taking out.

Sarah Farms Decadent Chocolate Milk

Densely packed and somewhat of a chalky feel— the flavor isn’t as bold as one might expect ‘decadent’ to deliver— but rather it’s a deeper, more sophisticated chocolate experience that improves over time. The sweetness and cocoa are balanced very well and provide lasting flavor beyond the swig.

Farmer's All Natural Chocolate Milk

Straightforward chocolate taste that is hands-down the star of the show. It’s competently creamy, a bit chalky, very much under-sweet (in a good way), and abundantly chocolaty. More chocolate milk brands should take notice— high chocolate and lower sweetness lends itself to a responsible, yet indulgent feel that really brandishes chocolate milk’s potential appeal to a more adult audience.

Fairlife Yup! Rich Chocolate Milk

Relatively thin and smooth texture dons the Fairlife / Yup signature flavor that most chocolate milk fans are well familiar with. It's sweet and finishes with an aftertaste that becomes increasingly unlike chocolate milk, dragging the overall experience a notch below median.

Mill-King CaCow Milk

Thin, grassy, and prominently acidic. The flavor immediately retreats to the center-rear of your tongue, and the sharp acidity makes the mouth water, more in defense than anticipation. One of the more unique chocolate milks I’ve had, both in terms of flavor and ingredients.

HEB Chocolate Milk

Creamy and chocolaty to be sure, and a pleasantly restrained sweetness that helps it to feel more mature. It's chalky, and doesn't disperse as beautifully as one would hope-- but all things considered, it’s pretty darn good.

HEB MooTopia Chocolate Milk

Immediate flavor rushes in with each sip— a rather welcome guest that stays just a bit too long. The artificial sweeteners are present but on good behavior, and despite a chalky medium, there’s plenty to like about this. It’s strongly salty, which outlasts the other flavors for the most part, but makes it easy to return for more.

HEB Low Fat Chocolate Milk

Feels artificially thick— 1% milk fat doesn’t do this on its own. Aside from the slightly inauthentic texture, the flavor is pleasantly sweet and box-checkingly average on the cocoa side of things. Some might appreciate the thickened viscosity— it’s not egregious, but noticeable if you’re afflicted with a similar sensitivity.

Feliciana's Best Creamery Cream Line Chocolate Milk

Brilliantly creamy with a hint of wildness to it that is reminiscent of grass-fed cows (it’s not labeled as such, so I don’t know for sure). Cream and chocolate are much more prominent than salt or malt; it’s decadent enough to serve after dinner or to use as a temptation device for getting out of bed in the morning. Avoid lunchtime though. (Just kidding.)

Kleinpeter Chocolate Milk

Surprisingly muted sweetness, which affords the cocoa flavor an untethered frolic across your tastebuds. It carries a mature-feeling indulgence rather than an adolescent ‘candification’— it's well balanced in this regard and remains drinkable beyond those situations merely requiring a quick sugar fix.